First dates rock...

Aren't first dates really cool things? Well, they can be. I know I've had
some pretty crappy ones. Probably more crappy ones than decent ones… But
whatever. The benefit of ending a really bad relationship (besides losing
180 pounds of useless flesh) is the opportunity to discover new people and
relationships that you didn't even know existed. Aw yes, enter the blessed
world of Craig's List. Home of many, many slugs seeking the one-nighter.
Or possibly just some grown-up talk while they plug away at their
financial advisor or teacher positions (freaky, huh?). I'm sure there are
probably a couple decent human beings wandering around too. I'm fairly
positive of it, since I have met a couple nice guys and remained friends
with one or two. So this was the forum to which I went, drawn partially by
loneliness but mostly but boredom at work. The IT guys must like it too or
they would have blocked it by now ;o)
I've chatted (e-mailed) with several interesting prospects this time
around, 2 that have materialized into real people (well, one only by
phone, but he's been nice to talk to). The subject of tonight's musing is
Mountain Man (M), single father to an adorable 4yo boy (A), who resides,
appropriately, in the mountains. Not too far into them though, and he
works in the Metro so there are possibilities. We hadn't been e-mailing
that long (just Friday I think) and I did get brave and gave him my
number, cuz he seemed so darn nice. We texted all evening until the
presidential debate started, then began again as soon as it ended. This
led to a phone call, because one cannot text commentary without becoming
bored. The phone call led to nearly 3 hours of chatting – much talking and
much listening to him play with his son. I admit, I was charmed. Seeing as
he's on my way up the hill each Sunday, I was invited for coffee in his
neck of the woods, which I accepted. But plans do change.
Nickels was in town last night, and I was still trying to find a hot date
for the evening. I'd texted with M off and on all day, and I'd begun to
teasingly ask if he and A wanted to come down for dinner at Casa Bonita (I
am the only adult in Colorado that loves Casa Bonita). Well I didn't hear
back for a bit and when I finally texted to ask if he was still thinking,
he called to say he was bathing and dressing A! Guess that was a yes but
he could've told me ;o) So Nickels and I met up with them by the big pink
fountain. Initial impressions: not quite as cute as his pic but not bad
either and he did seem like an awful nice guy. A was just TOO cute, the
kind of kid any mother wants to scoop up and hug. I guess I was
appropriately shy at the beginning, playing with A and chatting with
Nickels more than M, but it was still relaxed and I was enjoying myself.
When we were done eating I took them on the traditional tour of the place,
but I mostly let A lead, just prompting him when I knew he was
back-tracking, and he seemed to have a great time. M and Nickels just
followed along, and I'm pretty sure I could feel his eyes on my back and I
hid myself in playing with the child, it felt safer. Mind you, we did keep
chatting, and nothing was different than the phone calls. Conversation
came very easy and I never felt uncomfortable, and if I started feeling
shy I'd fall back on Nickels or A. Eventually of course we came to the
Cave, and I was worried A might be too scared to go through. But M assured
me that he wasn't scared of much and off we went. True enough, he loved
it. In fact, I think we spend a good hour going through. It's interesting,
the connections one can make in the dark. A cautious brush past as a
monster jumps out, or bumping hands as you turn a corner. After a dozen
turns through or so it was me behind A and M behind me, now and then
running a hand down my arm or resting his fingers on my shoulders, and I
got those warm tingles that I don't get so much anymore with the touch of
a man. Who was the last guy to make that happen… I really can't remember
despite dating several over the last few years. There was just something
about his warm, gentle, tentative touch… I'd always half-heartedly
fantasized about a first kiss in the Cave, all those dates I've dragged
there and it had never happened. But this time it did. Simple, quick,
gentle, nothing amazing, as A ran ahead and no one was coming. A few
times, as we made our way through over and over. And I'm proud of myself
because I don't think I was overly inviting, and I definitely wasn't
encouraging of more, and nothing more was attempted. I do remember the
last time though, A had run ahead to kill the hippopotamus (inside joke)
and M looked me in the eyes and used both hands to brush back my hair,
putting his hands on my cheeks as he moved in. Well, you get the idea. Of
course A came right back around the corner, victorious. And I exited the
cave, tingly and grinning.
There were more texts that evening, more texts this morning. After some
mild confusion over whether I still wanted to get together on my way
through, we made plans for that. I remember being nervous going to his
house, certainly something I shouldn't be doing and I know better. But
Nickels knew where I was going and I'd made it perfectly clear that he
should not attempt to lay a hand on me. Still, I was nervous, what would
we talk about? What would we do? Would it feel weird and uncomfortable?
And A wouldn't be there, he had gone to his mother's house. Simply put
though, we had a very nice visit. He made me something to eat and just
talked for about 30 minutes. It was comfortable and relaxed and I wish I
could've stayed longer. A quick hug and a peck out on the porch, initiated
by me, and he was a total gentleman the whole time. More texting of
course, and I'll be visiting again next weekend, but hopefully I'll see
him sooner. After all, his work isn't so far from mine, maybe we can grab
lunch between now and then.
Regardless of a lovely weekend, I have no intention of jumping into
anything serious very quickly. There's still this other nice man I'd like
to meet up with, and a couple others I'm talking to. But I did have a very
enjoyable weekend, and at the very least I've made a very good friend.